Every night I think about how fast the days go by. It feels like I am living in a different phase of my life. I pray every night that I have not made a mistake, or that my nerves don't get to me. Life here is so much more simple, its definitely a way of living that I have to get used to. Though Virginia has its share of gangs, trouble areas, and expensive living. The state is so well taken care of, the schools are top of the line and the climate can be really peaceful. Tennessee is not as well taken care of, but the people here are a little bit different in the sense that their mentality is very spiritual. The north lacks religion while the south is too involved with it. I had a good laugh in a supermarket here the other day when I went past the little section where the cheap 50 cent little mini toys are sold. Usually in VA there are crappy little sticky globs, or bouncy balls, or gum that you can buy. But over here in TN they had a collection of Glow in the dark crosses. At first I stood in amazement at how different the mentality is over here. People here are so easily offended by the simplest things. I think that is what scares me about the conservative mentality sometimes. People here are too quick to judge change. Sometimes I listen to what my best friends girlfriend complains about, and it just makes me laugh. She complains that Jorge listens to rap or watches stuff with cuss words in them. As if God will send her to hell for doing such things.
It seems to me as if this place has always tried to stay far away from what is the liberal north. I start to think about the civil war, and I never realized until very recently how different the south and the north really are. Though the north is more accepting of different people, people up north focus their whole lives on money. And when your mind is programmed to make money, people lose a little bit of life each day, and little bit of themselves every time that paycheck is cashed in.

So...So far my analysis is lol, people here in TN need to open their eyes and realize that their is a bigger world than just Tennessee. And people in VA need to settle the fuck down, and admire the beauty that is Virginia once in a while.
But regardless of the type of people here, all is so-so so far. I pray to God that I find a job soon or this whole month is going to be a nightmare. I've always been one to have at least a little bit of money up their sleeve in case of any emergency, and now that that money is gone I am very uneasy and I can't seem to lift the weights off my chest. But no one said it was going to be easy, but its hard to keep confident when I've literally applied to 10 different jobs and not one has contacted me. Though it kinda hurts my confidence, I have to keep hoping, something, even a job as a fucking cow tipper, i don't give a shit just pay me lol. I do pray however, even as desperate as I am, that it will be a job that I can stick with and that pays well so I can be at least as comfortable as I was a few months back.

well i'm off to bed, i just want to say i miss all you guys, and I see the little faces of my nieces, nephews, etc... every night in my head :) I love you all, good night.