What an interesting beginning to the first couple weeks of the year. But yes ppl, I still exist and I'm still alive lol, its just i've tired and I have been waiting for a good oppurtunity to really write something good for my blog you know?
Well here goes my life as of right now. So far this year, things have been goin up and down the last couple weeks. My dad got a new car, which is a temporary car, once the baby is born he will have to get another one, he might give it to me, but I think he is going to need money for the new car so he'll have to sell this one. But anyway, my school, after going so strong for two years without any "ghettoness" without too many fights, have finally hit rock bottom and has turned itself into another annandale high school of race. It all started last monday when a black and spanish guy had a fight after school, afterwards that tuesday, 2 spanish guys grabbed a black guy out of the cafeteria and beat the shit out of him, those 2 getting expelled and that one black guy getting suspended. After that day, all the black ppl started saying that they will choose one spanish guy everyday to "attack", and the spanish guys said the same damn thing. So far though the ones that are involved, are friends of the two guys that started it, and then friends of the black guy who got whooped.
Then something my dad said yesterday kind of made me a little mad but just thoughtful. And since I know my sisters are reading I just wanted to ask your guys opinions. Dad had told me in the car on the way to my job that he thought that I was getting too involved with Zulen, that me and her are too young to be in love and that we should be worried about other things than just loving each other. He also said that when I turn 18 my wife will be born...I mean is there an age limit to love? Is it true what he says that, I will be with 50 other woman in my life until I get married? But he has to remember I'm not him, dad has had many girlfriends I'm sure, because he always tells me about them, but I don't look forward to going out with hundreds of woman. Do you guys think that what I feel for zulen is just a teen love? Or do you truly believe in our relationship. Adults left to right in her family especially have been saying the same, it makes me feel like maybe we are doing something wrong, by just loving each other...But we barely see one another, this past week I saw her for 4 days, after a 3 month period, and before that 3 month period the wait was even longer. I couldn't imagine if we saw each other daily then who knows what ppl would be yelling about, but I just want to know what your opinions are, are we doing something wrong? Should I be worried about other things? But please just tell me what you feel because the last thing I need is a "polished" comment.
But n e wayz, back to school, I have to go to work in about an hour or so. Been saving money, which is good, and I'm still wondering what to do. I've been thinking about a GED, which I would use to go directly to college, but I'm not sure what the consequences are for getting a GED. One of them I'm sure would have to be career related, a GED wouldn't be very impressive to many companies, but I mean is there anyway for me to prove to them that I can do it? Like experience? Would it matter that I have a GED with a 4 year degree in college? I'm not sure, I have to look into that, because I'm truly trying to avoid coming back next year. But we'll see I guess.
And with my dad, dad wants to get another job when the baby is born :(, it'll be like last summer when I never saw him, and everyday I'll have to stay with that fucking lazy ass bitch who is irritating me constantly. Look at this shit, sure she helps dad sometimes, but in the last year she has given her family about 6,000 dollars to come here. And her family is like "don't worry we'll pay you back" ummmm, excuse me? I forgot how long it takes to save money in this country, how fucking naive can you get? so there goes half of dad's money, all towards her two brothers and her sister who only visit her sorry ass like once a month. What the hell man? w/e, it seems to me like dad and her won't last, because dad seems to be getting fed up with it also, but now he's stuck again, like he was a long time ago. He feels he has to stay with her because of the kids, almost just like with mom, because from what I see I don't think they love each other, they just get irritated every other day, or maybe its because she is pregnant. but n e wayz, i need to take a shower, hopefully you guys can answer my questions, :) your the only advice I would truly hear out.
P.S. GO REDSKINS!!!!! 4:15pm today!!
2 comments:
wow mike- so much going on!
first, i hope you don't involved with any of that crap in school. its so stupid, but it happens allot i guess, doesn't matter where.
as far u and z- let me tell you there is such thing as true love, and i don't believe that there is a criteria for age. it happens for everyone, just at different times.
i can also tell you that there will never be a love like the kind you are experiencing right now. even if things don't work out, and you do meet other people...we never know the future. i was 19 when i met D, and I knew right away.
love is beautiful, its a learning and growinng experience. you can meet someone when you are 15 or 50 and its still the same stages one goes through.
you aren't doing anything wrong. i'm sure dad and her parents are scared, like all parents are of their kids growing too fast. and as long as you have your priorites and goals, then they shouldn't worry!
i mean, i quit college to run away with d- now that was pretty stupid. but look how things turned out? if it was meant to be, they will happen.
enjoy what you have, absorb it in- all the good times, the good feelings, and remember them when times are bad, because there will be bad times too. love is just like that.
don't forget about school. college after a GED is fine..but you have to make sure you follow through.
worry about you right now. dad is an adult, he will be ok in the long run, he always is.
hope this helped. ;)
love,
v
I am so happy to hear from you! I miss your stinky ass...and I wish things were better with me where I could take you away...like Calgon...no? not funny? If you get a 4 year degree you can do alot....experience does matter....Is it to late for night school? I know with all that shit going on in school it can be distracting....What the hell are the administrators doing about it...??? The parents???? This shit should not be going on in school...other people deserve to have an opportunity to learn and not have to deal with gang shit on school grounds...the fuckin principle should warn them that he will expel there asses or expel one of them so he can make an example and kind of scare the other ones....and if they are not there to learn...then why the hell should they get an opportunity anyway...I am sorry but I hate to hear that this shit is going on...and if nothing is being done about it...then that is even worse....I REALLY hope that you decide on at least night classes...I know they can be expensive...but how about the long distance learning? Isn't there another diploma program right now where they give you like 4 "life" experiences and if you complete them then you can get your diploma? Please research into this...how many credits do you need? Keep truckin skik...don't give up...you have come VERY far...eventhough it may seem like forever...it really will go by so quickly...I am VERY happy to hear you and Zulen are back togethoer....many reasons....she TRULY cares about you....she has a great head on her shoulders...which means she has goals and has priorities in her life...I was actually dissapointed to hear you and her were not together....but I didnt want to butt in....but since you asked...phew....that's a load of my mind...:)...I think that she will be a good influence...I think maybe Num is worried about her getting prego...what you and her have is pretty intense...and we all want the best for you...and believe it or not for her too...both of you have soooo much time for that (real serious relationship committment things)....you both do need to focus on your goals and your future...because life will be a little more sweeter when you accomplish things for yourself...not only for your own self-esteem but for your relationship. I agree with Vani when she says there are ups and downs in any relationship....so keep truckin....bc no matter how many "chicas" you can get...there are far and a few that will actually love and care about you...and if that is what U are looking for...then stay with someone who wants something just as serious...Of course there are other people out there....Num was telling me the same thing when I got married to CB...he didn't understand...I didn't care that I didn't have 50 boyfriends...I don't care that he didn't have all this money...none of that stuff mattered to me...what mattered to me is that he would do ANYTHING in his power to make me happy...he protected me...he loved me...and beleive me...those are TRULY hard to find...alot of people are looking for a "fling" and if that's what you want and you are prepared to be hurt and even hurt some people...then that is your choice....I know that Dad only wants the best for us...and alot of times I think he means well...but he doesn't truly know the whole situation either...he's just worried and he doesn't know how to communicate how he feels very well...but look at his situation....I think it would kill him if something like that happened to any of us....kiesta is truly selfish and now her true colors are showing. My own thoughts on her are that she was planning from day one to trap Dad. And when she still knew that Dad cared about Mom and that she would be in the pic....she did it again...I am not saying that Dad has no fault in it...I know it takes two...but she is very persuasive...she can manipulate things...she tried that shit with me....unfortunately one day I was talking to Num about an issue I had with CB and she chimed in saying that I could seperate him and just live life that way...that TB would be fine..and that she has plenty of friends who live like that...she doesn't know but that comment was very revealing...I saw how selfish she was....I guess not everyone does find this "true love"...that love where the other person loves you as much as you do them...With Mom he had that...but to many things got in the way...his family...#1...they always hated Mom....and #2 her sickness....but that love was there...and I beleive it's still there today. I was afraid that when the 2nd baby would come Kiesta's true colors would come out....and I am sorry to say that I think we are only seeing the beginning....poor dad....I am sorry I haven't talked to you in so long I am yapping away....but these things boggel my mind when I hear about them too...I only want the best for him...and from what I have seen...she is not even near that....:( You are a bright young man Mike....I know that in the end alot of shit will come togethoer for you...but don't let what other people say to you dictate where to go...bc after all this is all you...your future...and by you commenting about it proves to me that you care what happens....that is very important...real love will always be there...no matter what...no matter if you took a break...no matter if other people came in between....no matter what...look at mom and dad...after all the shit they have been through...they both really love one another....and nothing will ever completely get in the way of that. I love you....please think things over...and try to make goals that are attainable and also don't forget to have fun....you won't ever get this time back. :)
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